When you feel stressed out

Ah… we maybe all have some characters who we don’t like or difficult to be friend with. The day when you witnessed very stressful moments with him or her, your day suddenly seems rainy day even though the outside is pretty sunny. I believe that there are people who we can’t get along. I’m not talking about discrimination. However, you know. There is a comedian’s quote. “Everyone has somebody you don’t like or feel irritated when you saw them, if you don’t have such people, YOU are the person.”

Anyhow, one of a character who I’m not enough to be confident to get along with is a person who talk too much (90% meaningless), talk too long, talk to me too often, and the story is re-run kind of story or something really boring one. I, literally, can’t bear with hearing boring stories, and sometimes I even feel total waste of time. Then, I feel very mixed feeling. If I say “Sorry but it’s enough now”, I feel like I lost against something. Hmm… am I rather an asshole pretender?

Like any people wish, I want to spend life with full of positive mind, and friends or colleagues. But, it’s just an ideal thought. There are no such utopia in this world. But at least, I want to be more generous guy who can be smile in any stressful situations with natural sense.

“Apocalypse Now” and the Coronavirus Pandemic

This kind of overdoing masterpiece film would never be created again

Everyday we hear the news about how Coronavirus doing since February or March till today around the world. Every channel you see on TV or radio around the world must be talking about how this pandemic going and why we can’t expect tomorrow’s world. Some are totally at a loss staying at home with feeling time passes so quickly, others are at a loss working at front lines with time passes so slow. Personally, I have slight feeling of guilt, for I can’t support any medical workers or people who are working for making today’s world somehow stable and civilized. I really thank you from the bottom of my heart.

All I cloud do today was also just staying in my house as much as I can, so I watched “Apocalypse Now” at this moment. This movie was a kind of my bucket list movie, and I could finally watch this final-cut version. Perhaps this movie is too famous to explain though, it is a kind of masterpiece film concerting on the Vietnam-War. It totally describes how soldiers becoming mad through the meaningless war. There were so impressive and grotesque scenes, and in terms of that, I think there will be no films like this in the future (there are too many legendary behind-the-scenes story of this movie).

Anyway, the story is in Vietnam in 1970, Captain Willard (Martin Sheen) takes a perilous and increasing hallucinatory journey upriver to find and terminate Colonel Kurtz (Marlon Brando), a once-promising officer who has reportedly gone completely mad. The film captures how the Captain and his company are also going to be mad under such an unreasonable environment. I feel like really sick during watching this movie, and in terms of that this is really the great film.

What I felt really strange or weird was that I felt this movie as a kind of metaphor of today’s pandemic situation. Everyone has noticed that this pandemic situation could be one of the biggest 21st century’s turning point, but some are very optimistic about it and others are not. Maybe Vietnam War could have been seemed like this way. If we capture this pandemic just by optimistic view like the United States tried to think they were winning, we can overlook some chaotic facts that really happens in the scene.

The social value or system is turning around these days. We live in a world where we can save many lives by putting your heat into a video game in your house, global economy never stands easily like before. Maybe we could see the real “fear” of this pandemic from now. I don’t want to fuel your anxiety though, we really move and think carefully with calm mind.

Today, a 28 years old Japanese Sumo wrestler has passed away due to the COVID-19. According a Japanese news source, he was sent from hospital to hospital when his condition was in emergency for long time, and it is thought to be one of a main reason of his too early death. I am 27 years old now, and I really am shocked by the news. I’m so sad hearing his death, and I became so scary. However, since nobody knows true answer, we just need to do our best in our roles. I just don’t want to be a person who just worry about, but I’d like to fear the problem with right and calm way, and I will never forget that we have still bunch of hopes. Below is one of my favorite quote.

“There’s no such thing as a perfect piece of writing. Just as there’s no such thing as perfect despair.”

Haruki Murakami, Wind/Pinball

Thank you for very much for reading. Stay Positive together.

5 Questions to Know Me

Everyday give yourself a present. I’m going to let you in on a little secret. Everyday, once a day, give yourself a present. Don’t plan it, don’t wait for it. Just let it happen. It could be a new shirt at the Men’s store. A catnap in your office chair. Or two cups of good, hot black coffee.

Good-evening everyone. I am a fan of Austin Kleon‘s (a writer who draws) blog, and he posted a short article on the clip . “Everyday give yourself a present”. What a groovy tip for us. Sometimes I felt like pretty disappointed when I check my credit card bill on my app, for I realized that I have received too much presents from Amazon (When I lived in Tokyo as a university student, I literary spent about $10,000 in a year mainly for buying books and good toothpastes. How awful it was. Now I left Amazon at all. A bit sad, actually.).

So, tonight, I’d like to give myself a bit of gift, which is “easy blog topic”. Since I’m trying to keep writing everyday, sometimes you can’t hit upon any ideas with what you should write about. Thus, just answering self introduction question is such an easy entry for me to blog. I really understand there are almost nobody who can get any profit from this article, I wish you could somehow enjoy this article.

1. Who is your hero?

My hero is Conan O’Brien, and Kurt Vonnegut. I think those who can make us laugh the most know the worst despair. Comedy or Irony is a kind of desperate and risky way to overcome their difficulty or hardship. In terms of that, I’m so proud of them and I want to be a person like them. They are my life savers at the same time.

2. If you could live anywhere, where would it be?

My first overseas trip was to New York when I was 18 years old to attend a kind of summer school in Tarry Town (the language school was EF) for 3 weeks. There was a huge story concerning on this topic though, anyway, that actually changed my life. Every scenery I see walking in street in N.Y. looks like an enormous movie set, and I suddenly fell in love with the city. Of course, my impression would have been changed after about this 10 years though, I frequently wonder if I could live in the NYC. But I have no idea what am I doing in N.Y.

3. What is your biggest fear?

To be honest I don’t care about my life so much. I mean, my mother seems to do care my life. She is always wondering my life plan or place to live or something like that, and briefly, my life was built on a story fighting with my mom to get a controller of my life so far. Anyway, I am 27 years old now. So, my biggest fear is a kind of situation that my life be controlled by somebody else. There is an interesting episode. Do you know why sometimes you feel like vomiting (carsick) riding in a car? That’s because you are not driving the car. I think it is a metaphor of our life.

4. What is your favorite family vacation?

“Onsen” (hot spring) would be one of a major destination of the most Japanese family vacation, and I do love Onsen as much as New York. (入浴: New-Yoku means to take a bath in Japanese. I’m so embarrassed explaining this.)

Once you take open-air hot spring/ onsen bath, you are in golden balance

5. What would you change about yourself if you could?

From when I was around 15 years old, I was almost everyday struggling about my ideal life or personality or dream I want to pursuit till today. I don’t know why I am so sensitive about my feelings or trivial matters in my daily life. I actually pretend to be a generous person who seems never care trivial things at all in my office though, true me is such a sensitive person who can decide anything easily. Maybe I shouldn’t blame such myself but admit. So, I think I want to change my such negative view of my character to the positive one.

Thank you very much for coming with me here. I hope I could present you a kind of inspiration for something. Have a great day/night.