Friday Night

So, it’s Friday. I don’t hit upon any interesting ideas to write about as usual but I just wanna sleep as soon as I can. Today was a bit miserable day, the meat in the curry I had yesterday was a bit law, and my condition in the morning was terrible. I tied to vomit in the toilet but but I somehow couldn’t. So, I highly recommend that you don’t eat partially law meat.

Tiring day of human relationships

Human relationship. In other words, 90% of trouble in your life is maybe this. Today, I experienced this kind of trouble. Why some people are so stubborn enough to make trouble anytime with everyone. Why there are people who can never bend your opinion and others who can talk with flexible stance. I sometime lose meanings of how important it is to be stubborn. Hope you are not in difficult, problematic human relationships troubles.

All you need to know about Japanese Weird Custom of Valentine’s Day (2021 updated.)

So, I have been hating myself since I cannot keep writing just for a week. One of the main reason for that is because I can’t find suitable topic I should write about everyday. But then, some of my friends told me a great simple ordinal idea, which is “Why don’t you write about what happened in your daily life?” that what we call “diary”, right? Yes…Yes… The blogging was originally meant to be diary kind of thing. Why did I miss that? Of course, I can write about my daily life because we have never spend the exact same day. Then, my story can be really unique one! Why did I forget the idea. I can write about my daily life. And I can even attach the photo of bento you eat!(almost every meal I eat is uploaded to my Instagram account)

Thank you for giving me chocolates (I thought I could get more, actually).

So, yesterday was Valentine’s day, right? Japanese Valentine culture seems totally different from the western original one. If you try to give some loved one a bouquet, you are seemed like an American here. Every girls are trying to give “Tomo-Choco(Friend Chocolate)” to their friends.

Yeah, firstly I have to tell you the Japanese definition of “Valentines day” custom. Actually, there are mainly 3 types of chocolates. Not sweet or bitter one.

  1. GIRI-CHOCO…chocolate you give to your colleagues or people whom you don’t care. GIRI means duty. So, call of duty chocolate you can also say, maybe.
  2. TOMO-CHOCO… tomo means friend. My name is TOMOharu, which means friend and spring or knowledge or sun or…man, Chinese character has such a countless meanings but, why we call CHINESE character? Chinese characters are different from the Chinese character we use. Anyway, TOMO choco is chocolate school girls or school girls minded girls in your office try to share with your friends. Such a sweet chocolate, huh?
  3. HONMEI-CHOCO… This is what we should call the real valentine chocolate!!! It’s the chocolate women try to give to the person she really loves! So, stupid boys or seniors always try to make fun of their sad GIRI-CHOCO as HONMEI-CHOCO. To the men, the number you get this chocolate sometimes means your value as a humankind.

Hahaha…So unique custom right? Anyway, if you know these types chocolate, you can somehow understand the Japanese Valentines chocolate custom.

However…. It seems that there comes a NEW TYPE of chocolate. Can you believe that? Why Japanese people try to make it more complicated even it is too complicated. It looks like the Japanese toilet shares this culture.

The one I heard 2021 is this.

4. AWAYOKUBA-CHOCOAwayokuba means “If there is a chance”. So, this chocolate is more than GIRI-CHOCO but less than HONMEI-CHOCO. Are’t you GENIUS???!!! So, if there is a man you love but hesitate to give him HONMEI, you can give this one. Why hadn’t we noticed? Are we stupid??? Thanks to this new type, girls can live much easier.

These are the brief summary of Japanese Valentine culture. I can talk about much more, but this is just a personal blog, so I’m sorry (Saying I’m sorry to much is another Japanese custom. We use it as Hello♪ALOHA♪, no I’m serious). Hope you have a Happy Valentine’s Day!

Should we stop every fun thing?

Going to McDonald’s is a kind of trip for residents in countryside of Hokkaido

Long long time no see everyone. I was really busy for reading books and writing Japanese fiction (it’s true) these days. Anyway, since the state of emergency was declared in some populated prefectures in Japan, the atmosphere in Japan is a bit heavier than before. The first declaration of a state of emergency was for all Japan, but some prefectures are not an area for this declaration. However, since we are Japanese, we love to sympathize or reading somebody’s way of feeling. Japan is the nation of peer pressure.

So, many people seems that they give up some fun stuff really easily even your area is not under the state of emergency. Of course, preventing the pandemic, and do our best for not getting infected must be really important, and we still have to make efforts for this even this whole year. But, still, I believe we still have rights to have fun with something.

For example, trip to near tourist sites. We should avoid crowd area though, it would also be a good thing to go and help the economy of tourist sites. Many companies are becoming bankrupt. This is really hard time to think about whether going out or not. But, easy “STAY HOME” is really bad for our health especially on our mind. The scenery would be very monochrome or tasteless.

We should prevent the spread of COVID-19, but we should not give up any fun things that easily. I hope people can live decently with COVID pandemic soon.

A New Year’s “Jealousy”

So, I am currently spending my winter vacation from December 26th to January 17th. Being a high school teacher in Japan is said to be really busy (especially junior high teachers. They are said to be the busiest around the world). However, the beauty of being a teacher is that you have certain amount of paid vacation term in summer and winter season. Still somebody can complain that Japanese teachers are busy. Maybe it depends on which school you are working at.

The long time no see amount of time makes people think of many bullshit things that never attracts you to think of before or after the vacation. Since you have plenty of time and power to think about tiny things, you can really think or getting depressed or angry easily compared to the usual work days. However, I became 28 and I have been feeling like I’m dealing with it these years. Then, I found a twitter account.

The Twitter account by LEMON(檸檬)

I know people’s taste or understanding is completely different and I have no idea what you would think about the twitter account. But to me, When I encountered this account, I was made into really happy and frustrated and jealous about the account because the view of the world of this twitter is almost, very almost the same to my imaginary ideal twitter account!

His every picture or tweet on the page seems almost perfect. Every single post or picture desperately tells me those tweets or pictures are created with deep thoughts and delicate technique of sense. Actually, the first time I accidentally found this account was almost a year ago. I was surprised that the quality of the account and I thought that the person who can do this is a college student, and he was younger than my age. Then, I felt a slight feeling of jealous at that time, so I had never seen from that time.

However, about 2 or 3 days before today, I accidentally found him on the twitter again. Then I found the pinned tweet.

In short, it says that his first novel will be published on January 20th, 2021, then I got huge goosebumps. OMG. This LEMON man has become a real writer. I thought he was a kind of young person who has a really good taste. But now, he became a real writer. I thought like, I tried to cerebrate him but to be honest, I was totally knocked down. I know the pictures or tweets are somehow directed by his effort, but still, he is too great.

The feeling of me was actually very mixed. A happy sad. Celebration and jealous. The reaction of one of my friend on the phone was “You must be really bored”.

New Year’s Resolutions?

So, it is 2021. 2020 was an interesting year. I could start learning how to play the guitar and broke up with my ex-girlfriend. So, what? 2020 is gone. This coming 2021 sounds very futuristic to me. Maybe we are living the future world. Seeing boring TV programs through this new year holidays, I felt like I watched enough TV as I should watch in this year. Then I realized the 2050 people would think this electric car TV-ad as very uncool. Anyway, future must be cooler. I have no motivation and feel much meaning to write about this new year’s resolutions, but let me try, even the world would experience more harsh situation.

  1. Be yourself
  2. Don’t be a pretender (of someone cool)
  3. Do what I should do

Simple, right? Too much detailed plans can kill you. The best way to achieve your plan is not to make a plan. However, the abstract plans seems to work this year. I have been feeling that I was pretending someone cool. But I have gradually realized that the person who try to be cool is not cool. The person who is not cool is really cool. I want to accept my craziness this year. I will not deny my honest desires. I will do what I really should do and want to do. I will brush up myself and be the best man I can be.

Happy Lazy New Year from Japan

Happy new year for all the readers around the world. Keep journaling everyday is very challenging but it would definitely have some deep meaning. Last year was the weirdest year in my life and I have no idea what will happen this year. Anyway, time never stops. As long as we live, we should aim the bright side of anything. Hope I can write everyday this year, and make some people around the world feel good.

The lazy new year afternoon in my parents’ place

Just finished watching all episodes of Damon Slayer

In my conclusion, the animation series of Damon Slayer would be the best animation series I have ever seen in my life. Damon Slayer has become a social phenomenon in Japan, so you can buy some kind of promotional items in the most of convenience stores in Japan. This animation seems rare in terms of beloved by many adults who haven’t been into watching TV animations. However, the story of Damon Slayer can be satisfied with adults’ layer, so I can totally agree this TV animation would be continued after this year. I honestly cannot wait to see the next TV animation series which would be expected in the late of 2021.

This song is a theme song for the Damon Slayer movie edition

Sleepless Night

Finally I have started to watch the animation series of Damon Slayer from tonight on Netflix. The reason I say finally is definitely I hesitated watching it because I though I have more things to do than watching them. But, then what is life for? Now I have watched 10 episodes just after having my supper 8:00 pm. I couldn’t stop keep watching for about 3 hours. I have no regret for watching, but I am very anxious or tomorrow’s job. But now I am learning the breath of all concentration. I think I can do it tomorrow!

Confessions of High School English Teacher

I am a high school English Teacher in Japan, and that has been causing a lot of troubles to delicate me myself. I truly think that I am often gloomy and active at the same time. I am ok. I am not that serious depressive patient. But you know, I think I am very delicate mainly in a negative way. Why do I started writing from such a depressive way? I don’t know. But anyway from now, I’d like to write about what I think about being a high school English teacher in Japan.

I don’t know much about the notion about being a high school teacher in abroad though, I personally feel like I’m not the person who really, really wanted to be a high school teacher. But my parents somehow wished me to be a high school teacher. Why? because both of my parents are junior high school teachers. My mother as home-economics, my father as Art. My parents are not a good example of good parents. My mother is too strong, and my father is a bit idly. I’m feeling really sorry for quoting this metaphor though, my mother reminds me of Trump, and father reminds me of Biden. You know, I’m not talking about politics but their image or character. So, please don’t misunderstand, but I think I know the both pros and cons. My mother has been scolding my father for nearly 30 years, and my father has been trying to ignore her provocation. Seriously, I have no idea why they got married and I was born.

Anyway, I had grown up looking their backs. They are saying school system sucks, colleague sucks, and the kids and their parents sucks. So, basically on this point, I don’t know why they got the job. But they also said like we are a public workers, so our income is stable and that’s why you can live as a kind of slightly rich rich boy.

Then I became a high school student, and for the first time, I felt my life sucks. Now I think it was all my fault though, I really hated school because there seems no place where I can do my best. I couldn’t play tennis well in the club, and I realized I’m not that smart guy in the high school. Especially, I didn’t like high school teachers. Because they are just boring and they never overestimate me. Of course I was a not that genius boy, but they seems like they tend to like students who get good points on exams or quizzes. Huh. What a boring people they are. That was the time I sweared I will never be a teacher.

Then, I somehow became a university student, and that was a highlight of my lifetime. I was making a lot of friends and unique experiencing in Tokyo, and I finally realized I’m doing pretty fine when I don’t live with parents. Then I finally realized I can do anything I want to do, and I felt like I can be anyone you want to be.

My major was an English literature, and I could get a teachers license of junior high and high school. But to get the license, you need to go to 3 weeks intern at your old high school. The feeling at first was totally not good because that was a metaphor of my gloomy high school days. But something strange happened. I was a kind of star when I spent 3 weeks because there are many experienced teachers, so I was seemed maybe so fresh and cool. So, I was talked by many girl students, and when I walk a corridor in the school, some students screamed to me. That was actually a bit scaring though, my memory of high school has gradually changed.

At the last day of my intern, students gave me a tie, flowers and message cards written like “Your English class was really fun! Please be a teacher and come back!”, “I want you to be a really teacher. Your smile is great” or something like that. In short, I was hoped to be a teacher. I feel I’m not good at doing my best for myself, but I somehow feel I can do my best for somebody else. But I haven’t studied for the employment test, which is not that easy to pass. You have to pass the exam set by each prefectures in Japan. But, I gave a shot. Then, something miracle happened. I passed.

The experience was totally unbelievable because there are many to be teachers who try the test many times to be a real teacher, but I could pass by one chance. I’m not trying to boost myself but anyway, I suddenly got a chance to be a teacher. Actually, at the same time, I also made another miracle to pass the exam of graduation school, so I suspended the right to be a teacher and I became a grad school student because the person who I admired the most was university professor.

However, the reality was harsh to me. Every classmates was so smart that I can’t catch up them. They have read tremendous books and had vast knowledge about literature. Unlike me who actually likes comedy TV rather than literature couldn’t fake myself to be a grad school student in English department. And especially, the life style at that time was not my type. All you do is read books through a day. Sometimes take a lecture, reading books, make a presentation, reading books, writing report, reading books. So, you don’t need to talk with anyone else. That was such an “input” days.

One day I asked one of my school friend, “Hey, don’t you think it’s crazy that you don’t talk with anybody in all day?” Then he said, “I’m OK because I can talk with myself”. That the exact moment I realized I can’t be a professor. I don’t have a life time theme for my research, and I somehow can’t stand the environment anymore. Then I though, Maybe I can finish this Master degree, and I can be a high school teacher. I can output many things.

At the interview test of my master thesis, one of the professor asked me, “So, Mr. Watanabe, after finishing Master degree, what’s your plan?” So I said “I’ll come back to Hokkaido, my home prefecture, and be a high school teacher.” “Why don’t you be a teacher in Tokyo? So you can connect with us easily”. Then I said, “Tokyo is a bit uncomfortable for me to live, and especially I think it will be great if I could teach students who seem totally irrelevant to me kind of people. Don’t you think that would make a great chemical reaction, sir?” Then the professor said, “Wow. That’s truly great”.

Now I am 27 years old and in this year, I become 28 years old. I have been teaching for about 3 and a half years. I think I like this job but I have no confident if I would hold onto this job. It is because I still can’t find a person who I really want to be in this world. I have hardly met super cool teacher to me. I know many teachers who really love students and are loved by students. That is beautiful. But, do I want to be that kind of teacher? The thing I really want to teach is English? Is this really what I want to do? Yeah, I know. Maybe I need to focus on what I need to do now. But then I think like maybe I shouldn’t have been a teacher thanks to a really lucky shot. I have met many young teachers who said “I really wanted to be this job, and I tried 2 or 3 times the test” or like that. Then I feel like, yes, you kind of people should be the teacher.

The result of education seems to come in a really long after, so I have no idea I could have made an interesting chemical reaction so far. Teaching English is so hard because there are many students who initially don’t like to study English. To be honest, I would think in my heart like, I’m totally agree. Here is Japan, and you can use translation app, and you can study something more interesting thing to you.

There are so many methods to teach English. So many confusion in Japanese school. I felt I want to escape from this confusing gloomy world as soon as possible many times. School system sucks, teachers are working too long hours and too busy. Should I really keep being an English teacher? I’m always wondering. But I cannot hit upon the answer for that question. I have no idea for the next job. I have been running away from true me? Should I face myself more? Maybe so. Maybe that’s why I like to write.